Blogging Revelations

I've been thinking a lot lately about the things I've learned throughout my blogging experience. I figured I'd share because I think some things are interesting. Be mindful this is my personal experience, this doesn't necessarily apply to everyone.

These are in no particular order. This isn't a rant or anything, just a very long ramble.

1. My beginning swatches were horrific. I had terrible cuticles, messy paint jobs, and blurry photos. That being said, you have to start somewhere. My swatches are still not perfect, but having a platform to practice swatching through this blog has definitely improved the way I do my nails.

2. I did not need every nail polish known to man. I think this behavior starts when you first start blogging. You have this impulsive rush, where you want anything and everything. You definitely do not need anything and everything to have a nail polish blog.

3. Giveaways can be a pain in the butt. I enjoy having giveaways, but they are extremely time consuming. You have to sort through and check entries, which can take hours. Plus, the longer you have a giveaway running the harder it gets. The more optional entries you have, the more work you have to do. I've definitely learned to shorten my giveaways because of that!

4. My initial concept of my blog never came to fruition, and that's completely fine. I think being a newbie blogger, you want to have some sort of hook that makes you different. I think I tried too hard. In the beginning I had little ideas for featured posts that really didn't work out. This made my blog more work than play. So, I gave up, and just posted what I wanted to.

5.  I have definitely changed my mind. Blogging has opened me up to a world of colors I would never touch. Can you believe I barely had any purples, blues, and greens? I was convinced all these colors looked terrible on me, but they don't. Now, these are some of my favorite colors.

6. Purging polish is good. This goes along with #2. When I first started blogging, I bought so much nail polish. It just starts to accumulate, and there is no possible way you're going to be able to swatch it all, wear it, and enjoy it. Plus, you end up with dupes, and colors you're asking yourself  "Why the hell did I buy this"? This was a good time for me to purge 300+ bottles. It feels good! Less is really more. Plus, you can truly enjoy your stash now since it's not so overwhelming.

7. My buying habits have changed. Once you've accumulated so much nail polish, it gets to the point where "you've been there, done that". Some stuff starts to all look the same, and when new collections come out there are colors you are 100% sure you have a dupe of in your stash. I've definitely become more selective. I find myself wanting way less, and I almost feel guilty because of it (i.e. China Glaze Metro). I have to think "how many of these polishes would I really wear outside swatching"?

8. My attitudes have changed. I have to admit when I first started blogging was very anti-high end nail polish. Now, I'm more middle of the road. I think the massive purge helped me to see a difference perspective. Sometimes it's nice to have one thing that is extra special than 10 things that are ordinary. I'll never be a regular high-end buyer, but I'll be willing to spend the money on one special polish I really love vs. 5 or 6 that I just kind of like. That being said, there are some high end polishes out there that are just flat out ugly. Chanel Quartz...gag!

9. Helmers are my best friend. I love my Helmers.

10. I prefer my nails short. In my earlier posts I never realized how long my nails were! They were very long. I think long nails look great on some people,but not so much me. You want to know why? They are definitely hard to maintain and shape. I'm too lazy to shape my nails :-/. I like my nubbins now, they're easier to maintain and take less work to shape!

11. Swatching takes forever. I do not think many people appreciate this who are not bloggers. Whenever I get new stuff, I put it in this blue basket in the area I do my nails. This accumulates over time, and I set aside a swatch-a-thon day. Swatching is ever so time consuming. I think that's why so many of us are so protective of our pictures. It takes a long time to swatch. It's not just painting the nails that is time consuming, so is the photography. I don't have the best camera so I take 10-20 pictures of one swatch just to make sure I get a decent picutre!

12. Commenters > followers. I think we all start out blogging with the hope we'll have lots of followers and be super popular. It is nice to have a large number of followers, but I'm not foolish to believe I have X number of people reading my blog every day. I'm also aware that probably without the giveaways that instead of the 1488 follows I have now I'd probably only have a few hundred at most. I appreciate the handful of people I have commenting on my blog much more. This is more rewarding and valuable to me than a number. *Edit* I think I may of said this wrong. I'm not saying I only appreciate people who comment on my blog. I was just trying to differentiate that having a smaller number of people reading/commenting and involved in my blog is more meaningful than having a high number of followers. I'm sorry if this came off badly, that wasn't my intention. I appreciate all of you who read this blog!

13. Sometimes people blog for the wrong reasons, and it can test your patience and your mouth. I've always been opinionated, and luckily for the most part I've been able to stifle my opinions. As a blogger, you have to be careful with what you say and how you say it. You don't want to stifle yourself entirely, but you don't want to alienate others and make them feel bad. Sure, there are bloggers out there who are in it for personal gain or other selfish reasons. I have no respect for those bloggers. It is so frustrating, and I've made some comments, that maybe I should not have. Do I think my comments are always wrong? Not at all, but do they always need to be said? Probably not. The Dalai Lama has said "Sometimes one creates a dynamic impression by saying something, and sometimes one creates as significant an impression by remaining silent." It's difficult, but you have to learn to brush it off. This is something I'm working on currently!

14. There will always be drama. I don't think anything in life is ever drama free. The blogging world has its share of drama. It can make a fun experience stressful and negative. There are many mob-mentality situations I see, that truly disgust me. In the end it's all beauty and nail polish. There are far more important things in the world to worry about. I have to step back, and remind myself of this sometimes.

15. Let it go and be yourself. I've enjoyed blogging the most when I honestly just stop caring. I post what I want and when I want. I say what I feel like saying, and somehow this all works. I don't try to be someone I'm not or the best there is out there. Blogging should be fun.

I think that's it for now. That's way more than I initially thought I'd have. Again, these are just personal to me. This is in no way a guide of how to blog or anything.  Sorry if this is so long. I'd love hear what some other bloggers revelations in the comments.

Happy Thursday!

Turning a new leaf

*Warning this is a personal, non- nail polish related post. If you don't want hear about personal stuff random babble, you may want to skip this one*

I mentioned on Twitter last night, that today would be difficult for me. I never intended to really open up on this blog about my personal life, but I find it therapeutic in many ways. I've been in therapy, for the past few months. I've actually been in and out of therapy my entire life, but I've finally found a great therapist.  I've dealt with severe anxiety, depression, and self esteem issues probably since I was 3 years old.

I've been trying to figure out where all this stuff comes from, and I'm come to the realization that a lot of this has resulted from experiences as I had a little kid and teenager. Nothing absolutely horrible happened to me, but I had grandparents, family friends, and peers in my life really make me feel bad about myself continually. I got really terrible messages from people who were supposed to love me, and I had no idea it was wrong. Since, I didn't understand it was wrong, I took it as fact, and that I was worthless and inadequate because so many people made me feel this way. The only safe haven for me was my parents. I'm so immensely grateful for them because they were the only normalcy, love, and authenticity I experienced with people in my life growing up.  It's finally now that I'm able to recognize and become aware of these experiences and how damaging and painful they were. I feel like a lot of these negative feelings I have about myself have held me back from so much in life.

Today was my first EMDR session in therapy. It sounds cooky, but it involves following a therapist fingers  and recalling feelings and emotions from traumatic event in order to process through them effectively, so you become neutral to them.  I was really skeptical and scared about it, but honestly it worked. I was able take one event in my life, fully process through it, and it didn't seem so painful after. The process is interesting, and very hard to explain. In ways you experience a lot of intense feelings and emotions in a short amount of time, and as you continue to process it becomes less painful, you feel powerful versus powerless, and you get this amazing release. That's the best way to explain it, but I was so scared it would be too intense to think about these instances again, but in away it was soothing.

I'm thrilled, and it feels so good to start truly feeling that I'm deserving in this life. There are other EMDR sessions I'll have that target other events,but to get so much relief from one sessions is unbelievable. I've been living with this for 20+ years, and I'm less than 2 weeks from 25. It's so time for this, and it fills me with so much positivity for my future. I'm starting to feel free from all this negativity that I've been plagued with, and it feels great.

I just wanted to share what was going on with me. Thank you all for listening, and do truly appreciate all of you! This blog has been so positive and fun for me. My blog has been my refuge away from perfection in my life. It's now time to embrace the "imperfectness" in my real life.  :)

<3 <3 <3

Turbulent 20's Ramble

***This is a non-nail polish post. This is a venting post. If you don't like LONG emotional babble you'll want to pass this one up***

I've found this stage in my life to be really trying. I find the most difficult part of this stage in my life is how to present yourself to the world authentically. I've gone through phases growing up where I've been stepped on and cast aside as invisible. I also used to blame everyone else for my issues, never taking responsibility for my own actions. I was great at playing the victim role. I was a great complainer and all around negative person. What possible good comes from this? Nothing.

Thankfully, I grew out of that. I'm quick to take responsibility for my actions. I feel in conflict everyone plays a role, and there is no one right or wrong person. I also try to find the innocence in people, rather than hold grudges. I try to look inside a person who may do something I find wrong or unattractive, and understand why they would do that. I try to be compassionate.

Though these are all great things I've learned, but I've turned these things against me. I'm so hyper-vigilant in how I deal with people,situations, and conflict that I end up losing a part of myself in it all. I never want to say the wrong thing, say too much, not say enough, not hurt anyone's feelings, be misunderstood, seem attention seeking and etc. I want to be this person full of integrity and loyalty, that if I even remotely stray away from it. I cast myself as villain.

It's completely irrational but that's how I feel. If I do something slightly wrong I'm ready to be burned at the stake. I'm not allowed to make mistakes. I also personalize things when they are not personal. I assume people are thinking the worst of me, and I need to prove to people that I'm worthy. I end up overcompensating with people trying to remedy non-existent situations and non-existent feelings they have for me, where I end up making situations 10 times worse. Self-fulfilling prophecy much?

I also have this "I need everyone to like me" crap that I know is ridiculous, but whenever someone misunderstands me or doesn't like me it really devastates me. There are times when I'm sad and my feelings are hurt, and I bottle it up because I don't want to seem like a drama queen. Then there are times that I bottle things up so much, I explode and make an ass out of myself. How do vary between the extremes? When is it ok to be outspoken? When is it best to keep quiet? I feel so stifled sometimes from being myself because I'm trying so hard to accommodate everyone else's feelings. This probably makes me come off fake, which kills me.

I sound like a mental case here. I know. I can say that a lot of pressures put on me as a kid really gave me this warped sense of reality that everyone is judging every move you make and if you screw up you better be ashamed of yourself. I know a lot of this is symptom of have an anxiety disorder.  I have this awful streak of perfectionism. I know it's ironic since this blog is "imperfect", but that's exactly why I made it so. I try to make this blogging experience something free of the thing I struggle the most with. I'm thankful for the most part I have.

I'd like to think there are others out there who struggle with similar things, which is why I'm posting this. I also know I am my biggest critic. Majority if not all of this stuff I impose on myself. If it was anyone else I'd tell them "you're human you're not perfect"! Why do I hold myself to a different standard? I think my lesson from this is I need to open up more. It's ok to release this crap, otherwise I get to this point where I'm writing you a novel. :)

Anyways, thanks for listening. If any of you struggle with this too and want to share your experiences or if anyone has any advice. I'd really greatly appreciate it.

Update + Quarter-Life Crisis

I just wanted to mention I updated "My Stash" page. You can go to it by clicking the tab above. What I did is I attached a link to all the polishes in my stash I have blogged about. The polishes you can click on will now take you to the blog post where I swatched that particular color. I did this with about 90% of the polishes I've blogged about. I didn't link some because I plan on re-swatching them because they were swatches I did early in blogging when I didnt' know how to use my camera. These pictures were especially craptastic. Anyways, I hope this will make things easier to navigate to find particular swatches. Also, I did this so you can see what polishes I haven't swatched. Please, please, please let me know of any color you want me to swatch for the blog. I'd love to take your request. You can either comment in the post or send me an email by clicking my new pretty envelope button up top next to all the social networking buttons. :)

I've got a ton of polish as you can see that I'd love to share with you (this is just the pinks)!

 (You can skip this next part it's rather long and not nail polish related)

Ok, on to my quarter-life crisis. I never intended to to blog much about my personal life, but sometimes you can't hold back. I really like gaining feedback from others and advice. I figure there are many of us in the same age group and those of us who are not but have been and can understand where I'm coming from. I won't get into much detail, but my college experience has been a challenging one. I wasn't ready for college after high school. I was very insecure and I felt moving far away from home would answer my problems. I was wrong, it was a very isolating and lonely experience for me. I moved back home, got on my feet, gained confidence, and decided I wanted to pursue the hospitality management industry. I moved to Florida because they have the best education for it here and for the first 2 years I loved it.

Well, now, I'm not loving it so much. I love where I live. I love school, but I'm starting to wonder if this is the right career path for me? I don't feel challenged at all in this field. The classes are insanely easy. I think I'd be great in hospitality. I have strong leadership skills, business sense, and managerial skills. I just don't feel like that's enough for me. I don't feel like I'm being intellectually stimulated if that makes sense. When I graduated high school I wanted to teach. I always loved to write. I love British literature, art history, philosophy, and everything that has influenced society and culture. I dropped this idea after my first bad experience at a school. I just associated that desire for that field with all the negatives going around me at the time.

As of now, the passion for  humanities has rolled back into me. I find myself indulging in books and documentaries on all these subjects that I have always loved, but just haven't pursued. I always have felt a strong desire to not only soak up as much knowledge as I can, but inspire others to become interested in how we've been shaped throughout our history through technology, religion, art, literature, and etc. I like the idea of teaching or perhaps doing some type of educating in a museum setting etc. The problem is do I change my career path and delve into something new and challenging or do I stick with something that's practical and I know I'm good at? It's really eating at my brain. I signed up for a humanities class this semester just to see if I really want to pursue this. I read in the course description there will be weekly short essays and 2 major research papers. I know for most this would make people groan, but it excites me. I can't wait to be able write again. I can't wait to share my opinions, thoughts, and insights. I feel so deprived of that type of learning.

I think I need to assess my current skills and how I can maybe use both of the skills to find a career path that would be rewarding for me. I think I just hold myself back thinking that it's wrong for me to change my mind now or that I should already have things figured out.  The people I grew up with seem to have their careers figured out and I'm still questioning? I don't know. I just feel kind of alone like this sometimes? I'll figure things out though.

Thanks for letting me vent. If anyone has any feedback, advice, words of wisdom, or support I'd greatly appreciate it. I've been asking many people in real life these same questions. I just like to hear people thoughts it helps me put things into perspective.

Happy Thursday!

Confession: Nail Polish Splurging

 ***Lots of rambling here!***

I started a poll the other week asking if you splurge on a nail polish brand that is over $10 what brand would you splurge on and would you even splurge? Here are the results.

Nfu Oh: 28%

Chanel: 16%

Illamasqua: 15%

Nars: 1%

Deborah Lippmann 17%

Dior: 0%

MAC: 1%

RBL: 14%

Other: 4%

Wouldn't Splurge- 4%

Before I get into more chit chat. If you are new to this blog you may not know that I only will review nail products that are under $10. This is just my philosophy on nail polish from personal standpoint. As a college student higher end nail polish isn't something I can really purchase because of the price, and I don't think you get any less of an amazing nail polish experience without purchasing higher end polishes. I'm not against people who purchase or want to have higher end polish. I just don't want anyone one in my position to feel they need to buy a higher end brand because it maybe a current fad. 

I think this was the issue I didn't present clearly in my previous Chanel Paradoxal Rant. My issue with it was I didn't really want people who don't feel they need to spend extra money on nail polish or really can't spend extra money on nail polish feeling as if they need to buy a particular polish because it is the current trend. I did try and franken Paradoxal as challenge to my argument.

My argument with higher end polishes was that many of them are dupable by frankening or finding a cheaper brand. If, that's not the case usually a lesser expensive brand will creative a similar color. This of course is not true for every polish though. I made note of Deborah Lippmann glittery polishes and Nfu-Oh flakie polishes being a good example of a brand I could understand people may want to spend some extra cash on because they are so unique and would be more difficult to dupe. That all being said I think I was a little harsh on Paradoxal lovers. I still do not want Paradoxal or do not plan on purchasing it, but I didn't make note that I think even if you're in my financial situation that I think it's ok to splurge once in awhile and  buy a bottle of something that you wouldn't normally purchase. 

I sound like I'm backpeddling and hypocritical now don't I? Ugh. The reason is I splurged. I committed bargain buying sin. Instead of having almost 400 bottles of nail polish under $10 I now I have one that is over $10. I must admit from the standpoint of this blog I feel guilty for purchasing it. However, I will not review it on this blog or endorse it as must have, because it isn't. It's just a color a really liked and felt why not? It's a rare occasion that will probably only happen once or twice a year. In fact in my almost 2 years of collecting it's my first over $10. LOL, I'm so defensive!  So, with that being said I apologize to those Paradoxal fans I was so hard on and I apologize to my readers who may feel I'm being hypocritical purchasing a polish outside of my under $10 theme. 

I still stand strong towards my under $10 philosophy. As I said before all except one bottle of polish I have is under $10. I still do not think you need to spend outside your means or more than you think is worth spending for amazing nail polish. That will continue to be the theme of this blog. I will not put any product over $10 on this blog. At the same time I don't see the harm in occasional splurging if you're in similar case as mine or just don't like to spend a lot on nail polish. I'm no the rule setter here and there are no guidelines it just depends on the person. For me my occasional splurging will probably be a once or twice a year event while others it maybe monthly. My main thing here is don't feel like you need to spend beyond your means or what you feel comfortable spending unless it's something you genuinely love versus what everyone else is buying. 

That all being said, I'm sure those of you still with me are wondering what the culprit polish was that I splurged on. Well, the culprit polish is Deborah Lippman Across the Universe. It was treat for my birthday, but regardless of the timing that it came out I probably would of purchased it anyways. $18 is REALLY steep for me in terms of nail polish. I cringe just thinking about it now. I feel so guilty guys I really do!!! I hope you all don't hate me for this :P. 

What polish brand would you splurge on? Would you even splurge at all? Do you find me a hypocrite for splurging? :(

Happy Saturday!

China Glaze Adore & It's been 3 months...

Today maybe a bit of chatty post, but first I wanted to show you China Glaze Adore!

Adore is a frosty metallic teal. In many cases I am not fond of frosty colors, but this being a teal and unique color makes it beautiful color in my eyes. This came out in the Spring 09 Romantique Collection. You can still find these shades avaliable for purchase on Head2Toe Beauty.

Now on to the chatter!

3 months ago from today I started this blog. I know it's probably silly for me to even mention that, it's only been 3 months! I could of never imagined back then that I would receive all the wonderful comments and great followers I have. I was the type of person who start a journal or a blog when I was younger and make one post and never return to it. This along with many other reasons was why I held off on starting a blog. I have been reading nail blogs since early 2009. I had an interest in blogging, but never thought anyone would read my blog muchless I'd be able to keep up with it. One day 3 months ago I spontaneously woke up and just said I'm going to start my blog today and I've blogged daily since!

This blog is very special to me. I named this blog Imperfectly Painted not only because I'm not the best at painting my nails, but as somewhat of indirect reminder to myself that there is nothing wrong with imperfection. I am a perfectionist in real life. I know there is no such thing as "perfect", but sometimes I give myself a hard time or stress myself out trying to achieve perfection. One of the few things I never felt I needed to be perfect about was nail polish, doing my nails, and now writing this blog. Nail polish is relaxing getaway and hobby for me. While writing this blog and sharing a bit of myself and my love for nail polish I've began to embrace imperfection in more areas of my life.

Finally the reason I posted "Adore", was because I adore all of you my readers. I know that sounds cheesy and corny, but I do geniunely mean this. I'm no Scrangie or Vampy Varnish, nor will I ever try to be (they are amazing bloggers by the way I just mean I'm not popular :P). I don't have thousands or followers or hundreds of comments, but I don't need to. I am so grateful and appreciative of the people who read this blog and the people who comment on my posts. I am so thankful to have found so many like-minded others out there who share in this fun hobby. I enjoy getting to know all of you and reading your blogs if you have them. Again, I thank you all for sharing in this journey and hobby with me!

OK, I know cheesy and silly to write since I've only been blogging for such a short time, but I do mean it all. :)

Happy Saturday!

Purple Passion Part 2 & Mini Ramble

Here is Part 2 of the purples I'm loving right now!

China Glaze LOL-is a dark holographic purple! This is the same type of holo as IDK just darker.


Orly Wild Wistera-is a dark purple creme I think it verges on a blurple. It's a rich color. I love these dark cremes!


Sally's Girl Your Majesty-is a med-dark bright purple creme. I think this is one of those that is a cousin/sister/brother-in law/uncle/cousins mom's aunt to OPI Funky Dunkey, China Glaze Grape Pop, Orly Charged Up, RBL Mismas and all those other med-dark bright purple cremes this season! :P


Zoya Zara love love love this color. This is a definite Zoya must have! This is a lavender shimmer with gold shimmer throughout. It is gorgeous!


-Ramble/Rant beginning- feel free to skip over this! I'm not one to usually talk about personal stuff that bugs me, but I figure this is pretty light-hearted.

I learned a lesson today, if you like/love something, it's not a good idea to be curious and ask others with they think about it. I learned this the hard way today and it's my own fault. I saw summery purse at TJ Maxx for $10. I liked it a lot it was cute and colorful. I needed a summer purse and I thought this would be great since I'm in Florida for casual outings or going to the beach. I purchased it excited and instead of leaving it at that I went on well known makeup site to ask their opinions. I got ripped apart big time saying it was ugly,grandma, and etc ( I had probably 50 responses all negative). It hurt my feelings, but I opened myself up to that, so it's not their fault. I felt so good before, why did I subject myself to criticism when it wasn't need? My boyfriend, my best friend, and Dad said they all liked it and it didn't matter what anyone else thought as long as I liked it. That is so true, so lesson learned. I mean as long as you're not walking around half naked in public or wearing inappropriate stuff in a professional setting it shouldn't really matter. If you love something own it and wear it with confidence! You don't need to go seeking others approval. -Rant Over-

Ok that's it for today! Sorry for the ramble. I'm now going to go run some errands with my new cute and awesome purse that I love! :P